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Gay Etiquette – Need some advice?
I just recently started a new job with a software company. I am on a team of 7. In my team, there are 3 gays, 1 man and 2 women. They openly talk about there lovers so i presume they could careless who knows.
Here’s my question, when i refer to their lovers, what do i call them? BF or GF, husband or wife, lover or partner. I do not want to be insulting in anyway i just never have been around gay’s for any period of time. I spend a lot of time with them. Also, each one of them wear wedding bands. Whats up with that? I live in ATL GA and same sex marriage is not legal.
Thank you all, these are great answers. Am I also wrong for calling them “gay’s”. I think I am. They’re people too.
You really have two options. You can wait until they refer to their significant other by title (wife, husband, partner, whatever) and just follow their example, or you can ask them what they prefer. If you ask just do so in a way that lets them know you want to know what they consider the appropriate term so that you don’t offend them. Shouldn’t be a problem. People who ask such questions in an honest manner are very rarely thought less of (and they act stupid about it… that says more about them than you).
As far as the rings, they symbolize a commitment just like in a marriage. The fact that the commitment isn’t recognized by the government doesn’t mean its less valid, only that it isn’t legally recognized. They can still declare themselves together with the intention of a lifelong relationship.
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